25-year-old me would never imagine...

"5 Things I Never Pictured In My Future When I Was 25 Years Old."




Okay, I have been wanting to play Flashback Friday ever since CableGirl started it. But I have been having a hard time getting my mojo back and blogging more regularly. We seem to be operating in crisis mode around here much of the time, and I am tired of blogging about that. So I came across this meme when I was visiting Greeblemonkey and I thought I might combine the two..

"What would my 25 year old self be most surprised about?"

I am surprised to find how hard it was to answer this. I was a pretty astute 25 year old and kinda figured I would be married (again) and eventually have kids. I was communicating on the DARPANET (the US Defense Department Network that eventually became the Internet) with colleagues around the world, and not only about business, so while I did not necessarily predict blogging, it would have been a natural extension to my life back then.

However...


1. I never expected I would be living in Europe. And I don't think I really knew where the Netherlands was! UK, France, Germany, Italy, yeah. But Netherlands-Belgium-Luxembourg (the call it Be-Ne-Lux for a reason) I would have been fuzzy on.

2. I never expected I would not always have a career. I had worked so hard on my degree and had plans to keep going (which I did). I was doing really great in a male-dominated field that was really taking off (early Silicon Valley days). And I just figured I would combine marriage and career and motherhood the way many women of my generation were already starting to do. And though I have really only been out of the career mode for less than 5 years, there are now some tax and insurance complications which make going back to work much less attractive financially, even though the kiddos are at a point where I could logistically swing it without too much disruption (or so I tell myself). But we sat down and did the numbers a couple of months ago and it would end up costing more if I went back part-time and it would only provide a small benefit if I went to work full-time. And quite frankly, it just is not worth it. So I am now in the process of mentally adjusting my self-image to one of no longer of being a career woman. And that is really something I never expected to do.

3. I never expected that music would no longer be a big part of my life. It was for so many years. It paid the grocery bills when I was in college. It was my social life when I was 25, playing groupie and roadie and back-up singer to a techno-pop band. And I was singing in the church choir on Sundays. Nowadays it is DD1 & DD2 who do most of the singing. And when the rare occasion occurs that the spirit moves me and I sing along with some of my favorites, they no longer sit enthralled but complain that the neighbors or their friends can hear and I am embarrassing them. (sigh)

4. I never expected I would be in such poor physical condition at this age. I had no idea that I would lead such a sedentary lifestyle playing chauffeur to kids. Plus the fibromyalgia has really put a cramp in my routine. I have a lot of work to do...

5. I never expected I would be known as the "Creative Mommy". My whole position has been that I am not about to spend the outrageous amounts for the pre-packaged parties and crafts when I can come up with something equivalent by using my imagination and what I could find on sale. And I figured out the trick to the fancy birthday cakes is extra icing (it covers a lot of errors). And now I find myself with the reputation as the Mom who throws the best birthday parties and I often get calls from desperate mothers who find out they cannot get the date they want for the pool/bowling center/tennis club/horse paddock or jungle gym, so what to do with a houseful of elementary school kids? Now if I was known as the "Cheap Mommy", that would not have been so unexpected!

Well I may be stretching the "Flashback" definition, but it really took me back to try and figure out how my perspective has changed. I promise to do better next time, but if you want to see how others have told some of their tales, check out 42 (she's a real hot number!!)

Me, me, meme! (III)

I am not very good at the "Meme" games that you find on many blogs. In fact I still owe Robin of Around the Island one from way back in August (I didn't forget!). But as I have been struggling with so much drama on the homefront that I've already blogged about, and I am a bit at a loss for my usual enthusiasm and inspiration, this meme from The Real Life Drama Queen hit me at just the right moment, so here goes:

A. The rules of the game are posted at the beginning.

B. Each player lists 6 facts/habits/secrets about themselves.

C. At the end of the post, the player then tags people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know that they have been tagged and asking them to read your blog.

My Facts:

1. I have trouble accepting compliments. My first reaction is to deny whatever nice thing is being said about me and provide ample evidence to the contrary. In fact that was originally what this blog was going to be about. You see Jen in MI of A2eatwrite awarded me this lovely blog-bling:

with the comment "...for her comforting words and loving demeanor and her use of "Darling" in her comments! And also for her courage in sharing difficult times with us through her blog and showing us that there are many routes in life and we can overcome adversity."

I wanted to tell her how wrong she is and what a true b**ch I can be. But then I know also how hard I am on myself and that the best thing to do when you get a compliment is to beam and blush and say "Thank You". So I am doing my best to beam and blush and overcome my dig-my-toe-in-the-ground, "Aw shucks" reaction. Thanks so much Darlin' Jen! It does make me feel a wee bit special to get such lovely bling and I will do my best to live up to it. And also a "Thank You" to Anno as I just know she was thinking of me for this award as well! I can only say "back at'cha " ladies!

And now the good part where I get to name some of my nicest blogging buddies, only...most of them have already been named by someone else. Fortunately, a few could stand to be named again so I award:

Rebecca James, my lovely Ozzie blogbuddy who is so nice that she can't even be rude when it is absolutely called for (see this post)!

Robin of Around the Island, a blogbuddy in Israel who is so nice about all her frustrations as a Mom that she puts my rants to shame. She is a wonderful example of what I try (but often fail) to live up to. She has great suggestions and links as well and is a truly fun read.

And my lovely "southern" neighbour at Goofballsworld as she is always leaving such funny, encouraging comments and I am dying to meet her in person someday!

2. While I pride myself on being a bit of an egghead intellectual with respect to my sense of humour, I have a very silly weakness for ... "light bulb" jokes! I collect them! I think they are hysterical. For instance: How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but it takes her a lot of money and a long time and the light bulb really has to want to change. How many Zen Buddhists does it take to change a light bulb? Two, one to change the bulb and one not to change the bulb! Oh I could go on, and I probably will in another post!

3. I have small feet. I wear size 5 1/2 shoes. In Europe this is size 35-36. Problem is adult shoe sizes over here start at size 36-37. I have to look for shoes in the children's departments. Last year I found a great pair of boots that were very reasonably priced and comfortable and fit me well. I almost bought them, until I realized that just above the ankle was an emblem of a bunny! (sigh)

4. I (almost) have "absolute pitch". Almost, because to have true absolute pitch you need to start training very early on to be able to determine whether a note is a half tone sharp or flat and be able to sing any note that is requested on command. I started training in high school when my choir teacher discovered this. But at age 15-16 I found this really boring and did not continue. While this ability is great when you are in the musical world and can make some use of it, it is at times a pain in the "real" world. You cannot imagine the number of times I have had to run from the room or hit the off/mute button on the Radio/TV. There are some pop songs and singers that I just cannot stand to listen to, and unfortunately they seem to be some of the more popular ones. And it took me a long time to understand why the London Philharmonic Orchestra version of a classical piece appeals to me less than the Berlin Philharmonic Orchestra version. Turns out the British tune their orchestra (you know when the first chair violinist plays a note that everyone then plays on their instrument when they are first starting) to a different note (A4 = 440 Hz) from the Germans (A4 = 446 Hz). While either tuning system is perfectly acceptable, and the musical performances are both equally good, the British orchestra just sounds "wrong", not flat or sharp, but not "right". And it bugged me for years before I learned what the difference is. Now I can listen to their recordings and know that it is "okay" and still enjoy the music (After all, we're talking about only 6 Hz difference here!). But I still prefer performances by the German orchestra and other orchestras that have the same tuning. Weird I know, picky, nonsensical. Just one of the little quirks in my life.

5. I have a "somewhat" photographic memory. I can't tell you verbatim what is written on a page or what page it is on, but I can tell you about where something is in a book or magazine (front, middle, back) and on a page (top, bottom, middle) and if there is a photograph or drawing nearby. It has never really helped me in school as I don't have the true recall that will tell me exactly what information is written. Just a vague collection of content and where it is located. It does at times help when I am searching for something I have read, but otherwise is basically a useless ability. Like number 4 above. Weird, and somehow gives me the impression that I am second- or third-best in a category but not really good at anything!

6. I am lousy at names and worse a remembering numbers. At least in terms of brain-vocal connection. However, I can remember a phone number by how it sounds when I dial it and sometimes my hand knows it even when my "brain" doesn't. For instance, I can dial some frequent numbers on the phone without looking. But I cannot possibly tell you what number I have just dialed. And I can hear when I have mis-dialed a number. Another almost useless ability. (sigh)


Now this actually not the first time I have played this kind of game. So if you really are interested in knowing more about my "strangeness", hop on over to this early post from my very first meme, or this one where I do 8 more "interesting" things! I do think the first one has some of my best answers! (Snort Warning! Do not eat or drink around the computer while reading this post!!) And that's it guys. I'm telling you I'm not that interesting!! Don't ask me to do this again!! But I do know a couple of folks who are very interesting and as they are also playing "NaBloPoMo" they might can use this as a(n) substitute excuse for inspiration:

My great friend Jenn-In-Holland at Something to Say... who is welcome to substitute interesting photos for facts if she wants!! Same challenge to her partner-in-blog (check out their Looking Into photoblog) Allison at Soccer Mom In Denial. And another of my favorite writers, who doesn't usually do memes but could use the excuse as a personal favor to me, is our lovely SOS originator 'Twas Brillig.

Before I Got Out of Bed...

afflicted

Check out Jenn-in-Holland for more wonderful words!

Singular Saturday - The New Game in Town!

Fretting.

We're following the leader! 'Cuz all the Cool Kids are!

Fully Booked...

I truly believe that you should not judge a book by its cover, but you can find out a lot about a person by learning what they read.

I have a confession to make. I don't read very many books. That's not to say I don't own over 1000 on my very own, and not counting the shelves of my husband's and both daughters' private stashes. Books fill the shelves in almost every room in our house. Books "To Read" are stacked dresser-high in two piles beside my bed. I scour second-hand bookstores and go overboard on on-line ordering when they have free-shipping to my neck-of-the-woods. My suitcases push the maximum allowed luggage limits when we return from the US because of the books I am bringing with me. Books are my favorite thing to give and receive. Instead of stickers, as soon as they were old enough to read, my girls started earning books for good marks on tests and extra-good behavior. And I read voraciously. But for the last several years my reading has been more focused on periodicals. I read all the periodicals that come into my house cover-to-cover. So every month my reading includes Texas Highways, Smithsonian, Discover, Scientific American, National Geographic, 4-5 Time magazines, and 3-4 telecom/datacom/computer periodicals. Plus the weekly Dutch national newspaper on the weekend and the 4 local free newspapers that come through the door every week. And of course the advertisements, which is the only way to know what to shop for as there is a limited supply of the specials and you need to be there the first day for a really good deal! And on occasion I treat myself to an O Magazine, and/or Good Housekeeping, and/or Ladies Home Journal, just to appease my domestic instincts. Some months I indulge in a magazine swap with other English-speaking ex-pats and I get British versions of domestic magazines as well as tabloids from the UK (which I generally just skim through). And some months I get behind. (I am still on the July issue of NatGeo!) Some are appropriate for reading while on the elliptical trainer so they suffer a bit from being stuffed in the gym bag. But I absolutely cannot do more than 5 minutes on the walking or biking machines without something to read!

And while I have been surfing the web since before it was world-wide (I was on the DARPA-net back in 1979!), I only discovered blogging this summer and now I read dozens on an almost daily basis. Seriously, I have over 70 blog sites under various bookmark folders!

So, I really have (convinced myself I have) a legitimate excuse for not reading books. So why do I feel so embarrassed when I have been picked (honored?) by Anno for the Book Meme? Because I love books and I want to be able to play and contribute to this wonderful list. I want to sound witty and erudite and insightful. I want to wax poetic and appear sophisticated and deep. I want to hint at my witty sense of humor and intrigue at the depths of my philosophical mind. But instead, as I answered these questions I feel I come off dull and snobby and much too academic and one-sided (sigh). I guess we cannot always live our best life. So here, dear readers, is the unvarnished F.A. as given to you by the Book Meme....

Total Number of Books
Over 1000. If I took time to actually count I would a) get caught up in reading one I had forgotten I had or meant to read a long time ago, b) be depressed at how many we have and berate myself (again) for not being able to part with them and therefore c) not get around to writing this blog!!

Last Book Read
Actually I am not quite finished, but it is one book I have actually picked up to read in the last year: Planet Earth, the book companion to the BBC series. Gorgeous, breathtaking photos, inspiring text that stirs up my travel lust, and heartbreaking facts that really bring home the loss we would face if we don't get the current environmental disasters under control.

Last Book Bought
Ha! It wasn't for me, it was for my Mom. And it isn't even out in print yet! But it sounds great and will be a late Christmas/birthday present for her when it comes out in the US in April. It is Shakespeare's Wife by Germaine Greer.

Oh, you wanted to know the book I bought for myself? That was Present at the Future: from Evolution to Nanotechnology, Candid and Controversial Conversations on Science and Nature by Ira Flatow (the voice on NPR's "Science Friday". It has some great essays based on his interviews with various scientists through the years (the one on why the bubbles sink in a newly poured pint of Guinness, even as the head goes up and why champagne quickly goes flat when there is lipstick on the glass makes for great party small talk!). It is being published this month and I can't wait to read it (I just hope it doesn't end up on the "To Read" pile for too long ...).

Five Meaningful Books
All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten (Uncommon thoughts on Common Things) by Robert Fulghum. If ever I get too stressed and caught up in the fast pace of life and think I just can't cope, I read one of the essays in this book or the others he has written. I am guaranteed a laugh and perspective. What more can you ask from a book?

Gödel, Escher, Bach: An Eternal Golden Braid by Douglas Hofstadter. Guaranteed to twist my mind into thinking about the world in a different way. I can literally feel the neural pathways stretching to reach further in my brain as I try to fathom how such geniuses came up with their brilliant insights. It makes me feel very small and at the same time expands my mind and opens my consciousness. Can't get more meaningful than that!

A Brief History of Time by Stephen W. Hawking. This slim volume addresses some of the largest concepts in science - the fundamental questions about the origin and end of the universe around us. He reviews and explains in relatively simple language the theories and discoveries that shape the current scientific thought. And the book became a bestseller which is a real achievement in the realm of physics!

The Tao of Physics by Fritjof Capra. Another physics book that made the international bestseller list. Instead of exploring the very large concepts, this one looks at the puzzles of quantum theory and the smallest known particles and was one of the first to make a link with Eastern mysticism. While it is a bit difficult to read for the layperson, its influence on the scientific community was profound to say the least. It sparked a number of controversies and criticisms but also opened up new ways of thinking and talking about science that has made these topics more accessible to many young people.

Sophie's World by Jostein Gaarder. I originally purchase this for DD1 but of course wanted to screen it first. I became so engrossed in the journey this book took me on that I determined to fill in the large gaps in my education and read up on the philosophers I had previously only heard of. (That was the plan anyway, and explains a number of the books in my "To Read" pile). The book takes a 14-year-old girl on a journey of discovery through the history of Western philosophy. It is accessible and interesting for young teens and should be required reading in all schools!

I know, a somewhat cerebral list that leaves me appearing rather one-dimensional. I'm afraid that is kind of how things are in my life right now. Too many books, too little time... But I do know a few other players who might have much more interesting lists. The shelves I want a peek at include Jenn-in-Holland (who somehow seems to manage to read more in one month than I do in a year), Gunfighter (who also reads extensively and does great book reviews, so I know he will have something interesting), Leslie (who has such a great sense of humor that I just know she has something fun on her list), and Robin (who has such a different life from mine but so many similarities that I just want a peek at more!). Anyone else want to play? Consider yourself tagged!!

Placing the Blame!!

You know the ones we're talking about. Those bloggers with their memes, interviews, contests. You can't stop thinking about it. You keep on entering, or modifying your entry. You think about something else you want to say. You add to what you've written or submit another entry or find yourself tagged yet again for another meme. Or maybe it's a quiz that you can't stop taking. Or a post where the comments are fast and furious and you can't stop checking on what else someone else has said. Suddenly, you find that this whole theme has taken over your thoughts while riding or driving, your quiet time when you should be working, your dreams at night, your blog! We (a self-appointed committee of like-minded bloggers) decided it was time to give credit where it's due and have developed this very special "Blame It On THIS Blog!" Award.

The rules are simple.
1. Sometimes we all want to blame someone. If you know of a deserving blogger, please submit your nomination and reasons for placing the "Blame" to the Award committee: Jenn-in Holland, Soccer Mom In Denial, Jami and myself. No one wants to be "Blamed" for everything, so please limit your reasons for nominating to specific and deserving instances where "Blame" should be given. Recipients of the "Blame" will receive this cool button

they can display on their blog along with their "Mea Culpa" at their own convenience. The Award committee wants to remind all bloggers that they should not be discouraged if their nominee does not get an award the first time as there is plenty of "Blame" to go around and at any future time it may be deservedly placed!.

2. Anyone who has received the "Blame" is also free to pass it on to another blogger, once!

We hope all recipients of the "Blame" award will accept it in the humorous spirit in which is has been conceived!

And now to announce the recipient of this first award, jointly and unanimously determined by the committee:

Leslie of My Mommy's Place: Mommy's Blog

Yes, Leslie had the brainstorm of "Haiku Buckaroo..." which took over our blogs and comments and literally drove us all crazy (along with many in our vicinity) over the last few weeks. I cannot think of anyone more deserving of this "Blame" and am proud to pass it on to her. (Hope she learns her lesson, but it doesn't look promising...)

Congratulatios Leslie, show your button with pride.

Got anyone else you think deserves the "Blame"? Let us know!!

8 interesting things (Meme)

I was tagged some time back for this meme. I am not really a "player" and most of my blogfriends have either already played this a number of times or not players either. So I am being arbitrary and refuse to tag anyone. (Maybe this is why my sandbox is so empty?!). But as I am in the current mode of disclosure on "Soap Opera Sundays", I thought I would go ahead an play this meme. It is supposed to be "8 interesting facts about yourself". I'm not sure if these are really interesting, but I consider them "chinks in my armor". For those of you who know me in person, you may be in for a few surprises (eg. I am not all that perfect and I actually know it!)

1) I overuse my favorite punctuation mark, the elipsis mark(...) which I use to signal a pause or a deliberately unfinished sentence. It just seems to fit how my brain works...!

2) I am on my second marriage. First one was when I was 19 (first indication that I wasn't in my right mind) and the wedding was held 3 days after the decision to marry was made (second indication), and was immediately followed by a move to California where I was not legally an adult (this was one of the reasons we decided to get married). The real proof however that I was not in my right mind is that it occurred while I was still suffering from the after effects of a double concussion and was not completely over the traumatic amnesia that came with it. For full disclosure, see this post!

3) The first marriage I was a battered wife. For full disclosure of this, watch for an upcoming "Soap Opera Sunday" post!

4) I have a phobia about spiders. I'm talking the screaming terrors. I have learned to remain relatively calm around "Daddy long-legs", meaning that I can stay in the same room with them as long as the room is not too small, the door remains open, and the spider doesn't move. Otherwise, like my reaction to all other spiders, I run terrified and screaming. My pulse rate shoots up so high that it is a wonder I don't go into fibrillation on the spot. The adrenalin aftershock following an encounter is so strong that I will literally shake uncontrollably. I cannot even stand to look at pictures of spiders. And I consider it a feat of real bravery that I was able to read aloud "Charlotte's Web" to my daughter's class, though admittedly it was only one-two chapters per week! I have not and likely will not see the movie.

5) I have fibromyalgia. It took years, countless doctor visits, enough blood samples to satisfy a vampire, and serious thoughts of suicide before I ever got a diagnosis. But there is no cure and few medications that help. Only relief I have found has been in regular, controlled, exercise, 3 times a week, 3 hours a session. But when I am in a "flare" I can hardly move which leads to a vicious cycle.

6) I have not been exercising regularly due to a cycle of flares (part of the reason I started blogging). At times I can hardly move and even typing is a struggle. This week my left hand is acting up and I can't believe all the typos (please forgive those I haven't caught).

7) When I am struggling with the pain, depression and tiredness that typically accompany a flare, I sabotage myself even further with my eating habits. I'm just too tired and lethargic to cook and resort to fast foods, junk foods and even drive-thru. And I supplement these with Coca-cola (can't get good Dr. Pepper here) and chocolate in various forms. I know better, but at times am just out of control and don't care. It just hurts.

8) As a result of no regular exercise, #7 above, and the fluid retention that is another symptom of the disease, I have gained over 5 kilos in the last 3 months. I may actually weigh more than my husband, but please don't tell him that. But the good news is that I have made a start at exercising again, am eating better (hubby has cooked the last week) and I hope I can get back into my routine.

So that's fulfilled (somewhat) my meme obligation with the exception of passing it on. As I said, I am not a good player. But if you want to play, even if you want to do a modified version, then consider yourself tagged! Let me know if you are playing and I will link to your post!

My first Meme -- all about Me (me!)

This is my first "Meme". I wasn't actually "tagged" per se, but read about it in my friend Jenn's blog and was so inspired by her that I had to stay up late and send in my meme in her comments. Come to think of it, this was the first time I got out of lurking mode and actually wrote a comment (well 11) and it was appropriate that it was on her blog which got me started lurking in the first place. She got such a hoot out of it that she even made her long-suffering husband read it and reported back to me that he actually snort-laughed, which is supposed to be high praise! So...

10 ULTIMATELY INTERESTING FACTS ABOUT ME...:

1) Even though I am/was a scientist and engineer, even though I designed semiconductor chips that are still used in computers and electronic gadgets today, even though my husband is also an electronic engineer, my children are both generally deprived of using computers, playing computergames, video games, etc. We do not own a playstation/gameboy/I-Pod/mP-3 player, etc. And though I do have a mobile phone, it is rarely switched on and I have only sent out about a dozen SMS messages, ever. By the way I didn't mention that I also worked to help market mobile telephony and data communications in the Netherlands, having been employed at various times by 3 of the major operators in the Netherlands. I guess the adage about the cobbler's children is true...

2) When speaking to non-native English speaker, I have little or no Texas accent. The occasional "yawl" does sneak in, but it's only because I have never found a better word (plural you can be confusing). My accent in German is generally considered American, but I have also been asked if I was Swiss or Austrian. My accent in Dutch is often considered to be Belgian (not necessarily a compliment!). And what little Italian I speak has met with such raves by my Italian friends who claim I have no real accent. However, when I get off the phone from talking to my Mom or girlfriends, or spend a morning with a fellow Texan or Southerner, then my poor long-suffering German husband can barely understand me for a couple of hours. It takes some time for the "native" tongue to wear off. You can take the girl outta Texas...

3) I was once mistaken for a "hooker". (Sorry, I've been out of the US for too long and don't know the PC term. "My bad!") I was in hotel in Vegas, waiting beside the entrance to the casino for my date who was playing blackjack. A man walked past me a couple of times. I wasn't really paying much attention, but then he came up to me and asked if I was busy. I smiled and said I was waiting for someone (we Southern girls are brought up to be polite). He said, "Well Honey, I'll double whatever he's paying you." It took me a moment to understand what he was saying, but the gleam in his eyes finally got the message across. I was in turn shocked, angry, momentarily speechless, and then amused. I straightened my spine, cocked my hip, and gave him a long slow look up and down. I then looked him in the eye and in my best Texas drawl said "Darlin', you couldn't afford me." Must've been pretty convincing as he backed away fast. One of the few times I've had the perfect comeback...

4) I have an album credit. When I was a back-up singer to an electronic music band, we scraped up enough money to actually cut a record. I not only have my laugh and a couple of vocals enshrined in the grooves of black vinyl (yes, this was before CD'S became all the rage), I have actual credits as back-up singer and "Executive Producer" printed on the album cover. Okay so maybe it's not 15 minutes of fame, but it is mine...

5) My youngest child was born without any drugs, and we were home from the hospital less than 8 hours later. Sometime I'll write you about how the Dutch treat pregnancy and child-birth in the Netherlands, a verrry different experience from my US and UK girlfriends!

6) I wanted to grow up to be an astronaut. Since I was 10 years old. I mapped out my career path, and pretty much followed it for the next 14 years (a few detours, but still got back on track). I wasn't deterred by the many times I was told that this was not something for a girl/woman. I was not intimidated in my Physics classes when I was the only girl. So many of the choices that have shaped my life today came from this original goal. I learned German so that I could read Einstein in his native language (and it was more "scientific" than French or Spanish). I learned to fly an airplane when I was only 17 years old. I was not bothered to be the "geek" or "nerd" because I had a goal I was focused on. Being left out and lonely only made me more determined. I even had the opportunity when I graduated from college to follow the same career path that Sally Ride eventually took. But when that choice came up, I realized that I no longer had the same goals, even though they had gotten to that point. It took some soul-searching and hard thinking, but I chose a different path. And today I have no regrets, well, not many and not often. Just a twinge and a "What if..." every once in a while.

7) I dream in 3 languages. Sometimes even 4 when I have visited with my Italian friends. I cannot even tell you what language many of my dreams are in. I just know that sometimes I wake up with phrase in my head and it isn't English. I can't say that it comes naturally to me, the way it does to my girls who change languages on the fly. But it has become "normal". We speak 3 languages at home. It is at times a real "cultural chaos". But as you would of course attest too, it is a rich, surprising, at times hilarious mix. My neighbors have admitted to getting a real laugh out of their eavesdropping on our backyard conversations.

8) I have gone for a topless swim in the ocean. Once. And I was punished for it and learned my lesson. But having seen the almost full frontal nudity that was the accepted attire on the public beaches in Portugal, on a day when there was only one other couple on a secluded beach, both sleeping and the woman having only a postage-stamp sized bottom, I gave into the temptation. I admit it was exhilarating to feel the ocean waves on bare skin that had always been covered. And it was no small feat to overcome my Southern Baptist upbringing and indulge, even in this less-than-public location. But it was fun, for about 10 minutes. And then, "OHMYGODICAN'TBREATHEITHURTSSOBAD". At first I thought it was a jellyfish. But no, only some algae, complete with the microscopic protozoa’s that administer a burning-stinging sensation. It left a long red welt, right across my bare nipple. I knew without a doubt it was a message from God. Baptist girls do not go swimming nude or semi-nude. I learned my lesson. Never again.

9) There is a gap in my memory. I was in a bad car accident (my station wagon vs. a bridge support on an icy road). It took 2 tow trucks to remove the car. I received a double concussion, multiple bruises, no broken bones but ended up with a bad case on pneumonia before I got out of the hospital. But the lasting effect is a 6 month period of time where I have little or no memory of events. I have since filled in the gaps with the stories and memories that other people have told me about those times. But in all of these memories, I see myself in the picture, rather than seeing the picture through my own eyes. These "manufactured memories" have blended seamlessly with those from before and after that period. But whenever there is the rare occasion when I try and recall something from that period, it is like I am watching a video of myself. Strange things these minds and memories.

And...

10) I used to be a perfectionist. I took myself very seriously and I never liked making mistakes. I was cured of this shortly after moving to Germany. Even though it was only going to be for a period of 2 years, I learned the hard way that I would not survive the stress of holding onto my ideals. I had to let go and not be afraid of making a fool out of myself when I tried to speak the language. This lesson was only too clear after I went to the office where six of my male German colleagues worked (including one who was eventually to become my husband). In a very clear and confident tone, I announced that I was moving house and was there someone who would be willing to help me. A very good, perfect German sentence, pronounced well and easily understood by my colleagues, except...I included one tiny extra word that changed the sentence to me announcing that I was removing my clothes and would someone be willing to help me. My conservative German colleagues were very quiet and stunned, and I stood there a bit confused about why they were looking at me so strangely, when I realized my mistake at the same time that they did.... Well, it did break the ice. And the colleague who did volunteer to help me move also helped remove my clothes some months later...

Tag! You're It!!