afflicted
Check out Jenn-in-Holland for more wonderful words!
Saturday, November 10, 2007
Monday, November 5, 2007
Hand Me Downs...
I was waiting on the school playground to pick up DD2 when I noticed a little girl playing who was wearing a sweater just like one of DD2's. I was about to tell her that and let her know that it was one of DD2's and my favorites and that it was really pretty. Then she ran to her mother who was in the circle of moms I was chatting with and I realized it wasn't like DD2's sweter, it was her sweater that I had passed on to my girlfriend a few months ago. It was shocking to realize that indeed, DD2 was much too big for that lovely sweater and it was getting some good wear on my friend's daughter. I complimented her and she said, "Yes, I got it from DD2. It's my favorite!"
In the next minute I noticed out of the corner of my eye a little blonde head wearing a T-shirt I had seen many times on Jenn-In-Holland's daughter. In my mind's eye I flashed on her and then realized I was looking at my own DD2 who had grown into Jenn's daughter's clothes. How could it be that my little one was now such a big girl? (sigh)
I love hand-me-downs. Not only do they appeal to the "ecology nut" side of my nature, but seeing familiar clothes brings back such lovely memories of other young bodies doing similar or different things. For me, there is no sigma attached to hand-me-downs, only love.
In the next minute I noticed out of the corner of my eye a little blonde head wearing a T-shirt I had seen many times on Jenn-In-Holland's daughter. In my mind's eye I flashed on her and then realized I was looking at my own DD2 who had grown into Jenn's daughter's clothes. How could it be that my little one was now such a big girl? (sigh)
I love hand-me-downs. Not only do they appeal to the "ecology nut" side of my nature, but seeing familiar clothes brings back such lovely memories of other young bodies doing similar or different things. For me, there is no sigma attached to hand-me-downs, only love.
Sunday, November 4, 2007
Pitiful Parents Anonymous
Yes the SOS players now have button! 'Twas Brillig and Walking Kateastrophe have outdone themselves in their efforts to provide us a place to play on Sundays. Need to know more? You can visit them or this week visit our Soapy Hostess Thalia's Child. Don't miss out on the fun!!
My post this week is about a real-time Soap Opera. This might end up being an on-going story for some time, but I hope it won't have weekly updates!!
****************************************************************************
"Good afternoon. I'd like to welcome you all to Pitiful Parent Anonymous. Our first speaker today is Fourier.Analyst."
"Hi, my moniker is FA and I'm the parent of an OCD child. It has been about 12 hours since my last meltdown with her."
"Hi FA", the group responds.
"It is so hard watching your child struggling with something you don't understand and can't imagine. You can't protect them. You can't make it better. No amount of tears or hugs, no amount of understanding or patience, no amount of long, calm (as possible) discussions, nothing leads to any answers, solutions, or relief. And even when you finally acknowledge this is out of your hands and needs to be dealt with by a professional, you are given the information that it might never be really fixed. And that the process to discover what might work will be long and full of dead ends and solutions that don't work.
And so you go on with daily life, trying to get back to some sort of normalcy. But then that unfortunately includes the everyday nagging that seems to cause so much stress. Still, you maintain the requirements of clean clothes everyday, some semblance of body hygiene, regular semi-healthy meals, rudimentary efforts at keeping the chaos out of the living room and the rest of the house, a daily effort at doing homework and an occasional stab at clearing a space in your child's bedroom. And with these come the expected adolescent temper tantrums and vocal responses that grate on nerves and stretch parental patience.
Moans and complaining sessions over coffee with other Moms tell you that this is typical behaviour, but you know that there is a difference. The level of hysteria that comes from a simple question or request is beyond a "normal" response. The escalation into screaming fits, and destruction of property, followed by sullen silences and hiding and the discovery of more wads of hair from an already brutalized head, no, this is not normal. But I'm tired of crying every day, and am sure to do so if I talk about it any further. And so I just nod and sigh and drink my tea without going into further details.
My close friends know the gory details. We hug and cry together, laugh when possible and change the subject when it all just gets to be too much. I'm smart enough to know this is not all my fault, despite how much she tries to tell me it is. I know she doesn't really hate me, though this is very hard to believe when she is screaming it with such conviction. I know she doesn't want to leave home, though I fully expect running away from home to be one of the next escalations of the pattern of behaviour. And I know she doesn't want me to leave and would be sorry if I suddenly died and regret forever her last words to me.
It is taking its toll on the whole family, but most of all on me. My own Fibromyalgia illness makes my body very ill-suited to handling the stress chemicals that are released so often. I am in physical pain for so much of the time that I don't even notice anymore unless it steps up a level. Everyday tasks leave me exhausted and while exercise is the best medicine for me, I can hardly get the strength to get the kids where they need to be and can't even face the prospect of a workout. I am on the verge of tears so much of the time I don't dare face gym buddies I have not seen for a while who would certainly ask how I am and where I've been. And I have been known to have to leave in the middle of yoga class, on days when things were going fairly well, to cry in the bathroom just from the release of tension from holding myself together that I was not even aware of.
So it is a daily struggle that I am resigned will result in more of the same. We are currently on the merry-go-round of specialists who can advise on the treatment that is needed. But it is a slow process in an already over-burdened medical system. She's not yet considered a real danger to herself, though she is clearly on that path if we don't intervene soon. So we have another appointment next week to be followed by a course therapy and very likely a referral and another period of waiting before we finally get on the pharmaceutical roller-coaster and hopefully eventually find some stability.
The hardest part for me as a parent is not the current reality, though I am struggling with that burden. But knowing that this is an ongoing problem that my beautiful child will struggle with for the rest of her life. It is not how I imagined her future and while I know that for the most part she will have a normal, happy life, I worry about the periods of torment. These are the thoughts that keep me from sleep. These are the fears that tear at my heart. These are the struggles that make me shake my fist at fortune and curse the gods who have placed such a trial on one so innocent and full of promise. And at the times when I have exhausted myself with of these thoughts and finally manage quieten my mind, the small "I told you so" voice comes out reminding me of the doubts I had about my ability to be a good mother.
I know I am in the middle of the "grief process". I have battled through the denial of the problem and acknowledged that this is out of my hands and needs professional help. I have raged the "Why me?/Why her?/What did we do wrong?" theme to until it no longer needs asking and I know that there are no answers. I have negotiated all the various efforts to make things better and tried to let things go on without any parental intervention until I realized that this was only leading to more chaos in her life and more stress in mine. There is no bargaining with this condition. It will not wait until after test week or take a break during family vacations. It is here and now. I guess I've reached the stage of depression. It all looks bleak and scary ahead and I am just very, very sad.
But on the other side of this will be acceptance and I'm working towards this. There are worse problems in the world. And I am amazed to hear from other women I admire and believe are living examples of "SuperMom" that they too have been down this path and there is hope and help on the way. So I tell you this tale of my struggle to cope one day at a time and more than ever how fiercely I say the prayer that closes every PPA meeting:"
God, grant me the serenity |
| "The Serenity Prayer" by Reinhold Niebuhr |
Saturday, November 3, 2007
Monday, October 29, 2007
Trouble comes in Threes...
I know I have been AWOL this past week. There's just been so much going on and I am only now getting around to posting about it. I hope to be more regular in posting, and I have been lurking and commenting occasionally, but as you will see, I have been otherwise occupied...
I have never really been superstitious. I don't believe in astrology or any other mystical ideas, although the idea of karma for bad acts coming back and biting you does quite appeal to me. But one thing I have noticed in my life is the "action of 3". For instance, whenever we go on a trip, I will usually forget 3 things. Often they are small things, but once I have realized I have forgotten something, then I won't rest until I remember what the other 2 things are.
Trouble also comes in threes it seems, at least in my life. And this past month has hit us with two major things, so far...
My father-in-law was diagnosed two years ago with bladder cancer. He had two surgeries and chemo and has been in remission ever since. Until his check up a couple of weeks ago. So he's had another bout of surgery and will undergo a second session again in a couple of weeks. It has understandably caused some major stress in our family.
But the second crisis is what has me most concerned. About a year ago, DD1 pulled out all her eyelashes. It occurred in a couple of hours while she was reading a book and I was cooking in the kitchen. Needless to say we were horrified and started the round of doctors and ophthalmologists to come up with a vague conclusion that she had allergies and they caused her to rub her eyes and pick at her eyelashes. Only trouble is, the lashes never seemed to grow back
I knew that there was something more going on, so started the process to get a referral to a child psychologist. We finally got the referral but it took 3 weeks before we got the first appointment. And then 2 weeks ago I noticed a spot on DD1's head. She said that some hair had been pulled out when she was climbing a tree. Yeah, right. And then the spot got bigger and we found wads of hair she had been pulling out. Pulling out herself!! After confronting her with the evidence she finally could not lie anymore. And that was just the beginning.
Trichotillomania. That's the name for the condition. It affects between 3-5% of the population, usually female. And it is not uncommon that it starts in adolescence. It is a form of obsessive-compulsive disorder. And there are various forms of treatment. But no guarantee of success.
The past week the kids have been home for vacation, and DD1 has been working on a project for school that is due next week. Instead of being a break from stress, we have had some major "flare-ups" and now DD1 is missing about 20% of her hair. It looks terrible and there is no hiding it. And since her school does not allow for hats or hoods to be worn during class, she is going to have to deal with the attention from her classmates. Wednesday, when we have the appointment with the psychologist, cannot come soon enough.
So those are the two crises. And while I'm not superstitious and I don't want to be pessimistic, I am just dreading what comes next...
I have never really been superstitious. I don't believe in astrology or any other mystical ideas, although the idea of karma for bad acts coming back and biting you does quite appeal to me. But one thing I have noticed in my life is the "action of 3". For instance, whenever we go on a trip, I will usually forget 3 things. Often they are small things, but once I have realized I have forgotten something, then I won't rest until I remember what the other 2 things are.
Trouble also comes in threes it seems, at least in my life. And this past month has hit us with two major things, so far...
My father-in-law was diagnosed two years ago with bladder cancer. He had two surgeries and chemo and has been in remission ever since. Until his check up a couple of weeks ago. So he's had another bout of surgery and will undergo a second session again in a couple of weeks. It has understandably caused some major stress in our family.
But the second crisis is what has me most concerned. About a year ago, DD1 pulled out all her eyelashes. It occurred in a couple of hours while she was reading a book and I was cooking in the kitchen. Needless to say we were horrified and started the round of doctors and ophthalmologists to come up with a vague conclusion that she had allergies and they caused her to rub her eyes and pick at her eyelashes. Only trouble is, the lashes never seemed to grow back
I knew that there was something more going on, so started the process to get a referral to a child psychologist. We finally got the referral but it took 3 weeks before we got the first appointment. And then 2 weeks ago I noticed a spot on DD1's head. She said that some hair had been pulled out when she was climbing a tree. Yeah, right. And then the spot got bigger and we found wads of hair she had been pulling out. Pulling out herself!! After confronting her with the evidence she finally could not lie anymore. And that was just the beginning.
Trichotillomania. That's the name for the condition. It affects between 3-5% of the population, usually female. And it is not uncommon that it starts in adolescence. It is a form of obsessive-compulsive disorder. And there are various forms of treatment. But no guarantee of success.
The past week the kids have been home for vacation, and DD1 has been working on a project for school that is due next week. Instead of being a break from stress, we have had some major "flare-ups" and now DD1 is missing about 20% of her hair. It looks terrible and there is no hiding it. And since her school does not allow for hats or hoods to be worn during class, she is going to have to deal with the attention from her classmates. Wednesday, when we have the appointment with the psychologist, cannot come soon enough.
So those are the two crises. And while I'm not superstitious and I don't want to be pessimistic, I am just dreading what comes next...
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Fully Booked...
I truly believe that you should not judge a book by its cover, but you can find out a lot about a person by learning what they read.
I have a confession to make. I don't read very many books. That's not to say I don't own over 1000 on my very own, and not counting the shelves of my husband's and both daughters' private stashes. Books fill the shelves in almost every room in our house. Books "To Read" are stacked dresser-high in two piles beside my bed. I scour second-hand bookstores and go overboard on on-line ordering when they have free-shipping to my neck-of-the-woods. My suitcases push the maximum allowed luggage limits when we return from the US because of the books I am bringing with me. Books are my favorite thing to give and receive. Instead of stickers, as soon as they were old enough to read, my girls started earning books for good marks on tests and extra-good behavior. And I read voraciously. But for the last several years my reading has been more focused on periodicals. I read all the periodicals that come into my house cover-to-cover. So every month my reading includes Texas Highways, Smithsonian, Discover, Scientific American, National Geographic, 4-5 Time magazines, and 3-4 telecom/datacom/computer periodicals. Plus the weekly Dutch national newspaper on the weekend and the 4 local free newspapers that come through the door every week. And of course the advertisements, which is the only way to know what to shop for as there is a limited supply of the specials and you need to be there the first day for a really good deal! And on occasion I treat myself to an O Magazine, and/or Good Housekeeping, and/or Ladies Home Journal, just to appease my domestic instincts. Some months I indulge in a magazine swap with other English-speaking ex-pats and I get British versions of domestic magazines as well as tabloids from the UK (which I generally just skim through). And some months I get behind. (I am still on the July issue of NatGeo!) Some are appropriate for reading while on the elliptical trainer so they suffer a bit from being stuffed in the gym bag. But I absolutely cannot do more than 5 minutes on the walking or biking machines without something to read!
And while I have been surfing the web since before it was world-wide (I was on the DARPA-net back in 1979!), I only discovered blogging this summer and now I read dozens on an almost daily basis. Seriously, I have over 70 blog sites under various bookmark folders!
So, I really have (convinced myself I have) a legitimate excuse for not reading books. So why do I feel so embarrassed when I have been picked (honored?) by Anno for the Book Meme? Because I love books and I want to be able to play and contribute to this wonderful list. I want to sound witty and erudite and insightful. I want to wax poetic and appear sophisticated and deep. I want to hint at my witty sense of humor and intrigue at the depths of my philosophical mind. But instead, as I answered these questions I feel I come off dull and snobby and much too academic and one-sided (sigh). I guess we cannot always live our best life. So here, dear readers, is the unvarnished F.A. as given to you by the Book Meme....
Total Number of Books
Over 1000. If I took time to actually count I would a) get caught up in reading one I had forgotten I had or meant to read a long time ago, b) be depressed at how many we have and berate myself (again) for not being able to part with them and therefore c) not get around to writing this blog!!
Last Book Read
Actually I am not quite finished, but it is one book I have actually picked up to read in the last year: Planet Earth, the book companion to the BBC series. Gorgeous, breathtaking photos, inspiring text that stirs up my travel lust, and heartbreaking facts that really bring home the loss we would face if we don't get the current environmental disasters under control.
Last Book Bought
Ha! It wasn't for me, it was for my Mom. And it isn't even out in print yet! But it sounds great and will be a late Christmas/birthday present for her when it comes out in the US in April. It is Shakespeare's Wife by Germaine Greer.
Oh, you wanted to know the book I bought for myself? That was Present at the Future: from Evolution to Nanotechnology, Candid and Controversial Conversations on Science and Nature by Ira Flatow (the voice on NPR's "Science Friday". It has some great essays based on his interviews with various scientists through the years (the one on why the bubbles sink in a newly poured pint of Guinness, even as the head goes up and why champagne quickly goes flat when there is lipstick on the glass makes for great party small talk!). It is being published this month and I can't wait to read it (I just hope it doesn't end up on the "To Read" pile for too long ...).
Five Meaningful Books
All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten (Uncommon thoughts on Common Things) by Robert Fulghum. If ever I get too stressed and caught up in the fast pace of life and think I just can't cope, I read one of the essays in this book or the others he has written. I am guaranteed a laugh and perspective. What more can you ask from a book?
Gödel, Escher, Bach: An Eternal Golden Braid by Douglas Hofstadter. Guaranteed to twist my mind into thinking about the world in a different way. I can literally feel the neural pathways stretching to reach further in my brain as I try to fathom how such geniuses came up with their brilliant insights. It makes me feel very small and at the same time expands my mind and opens my consciousness. Can't get more meaningful than that!
A Brief History of Time by Stephen W. Hawking. This slim volume addresses some of the largest concepts in science - the fundamental questions about the origin and end of the universe around us. He reviews and explains in relatively simple language the theories and discoveries that shape the current scientific thought. And the book became a bestseller which is a real achievement in the realm of physics!
The Tao of Physics by Fritjof Capra. Another physics book that made the international bestseller list. Instead of exploring the very large concepts, this one looks at the puzzles of quantum theory and the smallest known particles and was one of the first to make a link with Eastern mysticism. While it is a bit difficult to read for the layperson, its influence on the scientific community was profound to say the least. It sparked a number of controversies and criticisms but also opened up new ways of thinking and talking about science that has made these topics more accessible to many young people.
Sophie's World by Jostein Gaarder. I originally purchase this for DD1 but of course wanted to screen it first. I became so engrossed in the journey this book took me on that I determined to fill in the large gaps in my education and read up on the philosophers I had previously only heard of. (That was the plan anyway, and explains a number of the books in my "To Read" pile). The book takes a 14-year-old girl on a journey of discovery through the history of Western philosophy. It is accessible and interesting for young teens and should be required reading in all schools!
I know, a somewhat cerebral list that leaves me appearing rather one-dimensional. I'm afraid that is kind of how things are in my life right now. Too many books, too little time... But I do know a few other players who might have much more interesting lists. The shelves I want a peek at include Jenn-in-Holland (who somehow seems to manage to read more in one month than I do in a year), Gunfighter (who also reads extensively and does great book reviews, so I know he will have something interesting), Leslie (who has such a great sense of humor that I just know she has something fun on her list), and Robin (who has such a different life from mine but so many similarities that I just want a peek at more!). Anyone else want to play? Consider yourself tagged!!
I have a confession to make. I don't read very many books. That's not to say I don't own over 1000 on my very own, and not counting the shelves of my husband's and both daughters' private stashes. Books fill the shelves in almost every room in our house. Books "To Read" are stacked dresser-high in two piles beside my bed. I scour second-hand bookstores and go overboard on on-line ordering when they have free-shipping to my neck-of-the-woods. My suitcases push the maximum allowed luggage limits when we return from the US because of the books I am bringing with me. Books are my favorite thing to give and receive. Instead of stickers, as soon as they were old enough to read, my girls started earning books for good marks on tests and extra-good behavior. And I read voraciously. But for the last several years my reading has been more focused on periodicals. I read all the periodicals that come into my house cover-to-cover. So every month my reading includes Texas Highways, Smithsonian, Discover, Scientific American, National Geographic, 4-5 Time magazines, and 3-4 telecom/datacom/computer periodicals. Plus the weekly Dutch national newspaper on the weekend and the 4 local free newspapers that come through the door every week. And of course the advertisements, which is the only way to know what to shop for as there is a limited supply of the specials and you need to be there the first day for a really good deal! And on occasion I treat myself to an O Magazine, and/or Good Housekeeping, and/or Ladies Home Journal, just to appease my domestic instincts. Some months I indulge in a magazine swap with other English-speaking ex-pats and I get British versions of domestic magazines as well as tabloids from the UK (which I generally just skim through). And some months I get behind. (I am still on the July issue of NatGeo!) Some are appropriate for reading while on the elliptical trainer so they suffer a bit from being stuffed in the gym bag. But I absolutely cannot do more than 5 minutes on the walking or biking machines without something to read!
And while I have been surfing the web since before it was world-wide (I was on the DARPA-net back in 1979!), I only discovered blogging this summer and now I read dozens on an almost daily basis. Seriously, I have over 70 blog sites under various bookmark folders!
So, I really have (convinced myself I have) a legitimate excuse for not reading books. So why do I feel so embarrassed when I have been picked (honored?) by Anno for the Book Meme? Because I love books and I want to be able to play and contribute to this wonderful list. I want to sound witty and erudite and insightful. I want to wax poetic and appear sophisticated and deep. I want to hint at my witty sense of humor and intrigue at the depths of my philosophical mind. But instead, as I answered these questions I feel I come off dull and snobby and much too academic and one-sided (sigh). I guess we cannot always live our best life. So here, dear readers, is the unvarnished F.A. as given to you by the Book Meme....
Total Number of Books
Over 1000. If I took time to actually count I would a) get caught up in reading one I had forgotten I had or meant to read a long time ago, b) be depressed at how many we have and berate myself (again) for not being able to part with them and therefore c) not get around to writing this blog!!
Last Book Read
Actually I am not quite finished, but it is one book I have actually picked up to read in the last year: Planet Earth, the book companion to the BBC series. Gorgeous, breathtaking photos, inspiring text that stirs up my travel lust, and heartbreaking facts that really bring home the loss we would face if we don't get the current environmental disasters under control.
Last Book Bought
Ha! It wasn't for me, it was for my Mom. And it isn't even out in print yet! But it sounds great and will be a late Christmas/birthday present for her when it comes out in the US in April. It is Shakespeare's Wife by Germaine Greer.
Oh, you wanted to know the book I bought for myself? That was Present at the Future: from Evolution to Nanotechnology, Candid and Controversial Conversations on Science and Nature by Ira Flatow (the voice on NPR's "Science Friday". It has some great essays based on his interviews with various scientists through the years (the one on why the bubbles sink in a newly poured pint of Guinness, even as the head goes up and why champagne quickly goes flat when there is lipstick on the glass makes for great party small talk!). It is being published this month and I can't wait to read it (I just hope it doesn't end up on the "To Read" pile for too long ...).
Five Meaningful Books
All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten (Uncommon thoughts on Common Things) by Robert Fulghum. If ever I get too stressed and caught up in the fast pace of life and think I just can't cope, I read one of the essays in this book or the others he has written. I am guaranteed a laugh and perspective. What more can you ask from a book?
Gödel, Escher, Bach: An Eternal Golden Braid by Douglas Hofstadter. Guaranteed to twist my mind into thinking about the world in a different way. I can literally feel the neural pathways stretching to reach further in my brain as I try to fathom how such geniuses came up with their brilliant insights. It makes me feel very small and at the same time expands my mind and opens my consciousness. Can't get more meaningful than that!
A Brief History of Time by Stephen W. Hawking. This slim volume addresses some of the largest concepts in science - the fundamental questions about the origin and end of the universe around us. He reviews and explains in relatively simple language the theories and discoveries that shape the current scientific thought. And the book became a bestseller which is a real achievement in the realm of physics!
The Tao of Physics by Fritjof Capra. Another physics book that made the international bestseller list. Instead of exploring the very large concepts, this one looks at the puzzles of quantum theory and the smallest known particles and was one of the first to make a link with Eastern mysticism. While it is a bit difficult to read for the layperson, its influence on the scientific community was profound to say the least. It sparked a number of controversies and criticisms but also opened up new ways of thinking and talking about science that has made these topics more accessible to many young people.
Sophie's World by Jostein Gaarder. I originally purchase this for DD1 but of course wanted to screen it first. I became so engrossed in the journey this book took me on that I determined to fill in the large gaps in my education and read up on the philosophers I had previously only heard of. (That was the plan anyway, and explains a number of the books in my "To Read" pile). The book takes a 14-year-old girl on a journey of discovery through the history of Western philosophy. It is accessible and interesting for young teens and should be required reading in all schools!
I know, a somewhat cerebral list that leaves me appearing rather one-dimensional. I'm afraid that is kind of how things are in my life right now. Too many books, too little time... But I do know a few other players who might have much more interesting lists. The shelves I want a peek at include Jenn-in-Holland (who somehow seems to manage to read more in one month than I do in a year), Gunfighter (who also reads extensively and does great book reviews, so I know he will have something interesting), Leslie (who has such a great sense of humor that I just know she has something fun on her list), and Robin (who has such a different life from mine but so many similarities that I just want a peek at more!). Anyone else want to play? Consider yourself tagged!!
Sunday, October 14, 2007
It's Not Easy Being Green...
Today is Soap Opera Sunday, and Monday when a lot of us do our blog reading is Blog Action Day, so I thought I would take advantage of the regular readership and combine my post for these two great actions (and maybe generate some new S.O.S. readers in the process!). For those of you unfamiliar with S.O.S., please check out the blog of 'Twas Brillig for the rules and other links (our other hostess Walking Kateastrophe is sitting out this week). They are (in)famous for the "recycling" of various tales of romance, drama, heartbreak, mayhem, and various (environmentally friendly) sudsy tales and provide all the links on their blogs. And for those of you unaware of Blog Action Day, this action co-ordinates bloggers around the world to think and write about a single important topic. In this, its inaugural year, the topic is the environment. And what, dear S.O.S. readers, could be so dramatic about the environment that it would generate such a soapy tale? Just read on...
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Several years ago when DD1 was in the Dutch equivalent of first grade, her class got involved in a project to help "Save the Environment" and each child came home with a contract that they were to sign that committed them and their family to doing one extra thing for a whole month to reduce the amount of waste that their family contributes to the environment. While this sounds like a great principle, it created a major dilemma for us as we were already doing almost everything we could to reduce the amount of waste we generate. The contract came with a few simple examples that we had already been following for years:
And we have always been very careful about chemical waste. Used batteries are stored for when the "Chemical Car" comes to collect about once every two months. This vehicle, operated by the village, also collects any old household rest products such as paint, cleaning fluid, insecticides, aerosol spay cans, old medicines, and small electrical appliances and disposes of them responsibly. We have always used re-chargeable batteries or used an adapter instead of disposable batteries. And vinegar is one of my favorite cleaning products for cleaning glass and removing grease! Where possible we use CFC light bulbs and we turn off lights and electrical appliances when not in use. We use cloth hand towels instead of paper and coffee mugs instead of disposable cups (even at work!).
We have even adapted our gift-giving as often times there is really nothing we need or want and it is difficult to find something to send overseas friends and family. So instead we have a number of websites (listed here) where we can give to a charity in someone's name and they will receive a card describing their gift and how it helps. DD1 loved "adopting" a dolphin one year. One of my favorite gifts from my last birthday was a goat!
In other words, we have always been a very ecologically conscious family and have adapted our lifestyle as far as possible to try and live what we believe in. So when this project came along, it created a major drama (appropriate for S.O.S.) in our family to try and come up with something more we could do to meet the requirements of the contract our daughter wanted to sign and set a good example for her. She was in floods of tears at the thought of being the only one who could not put down something on the contract and my explanation that we were probably the most ecologically-minded family at the entire school did nothing to comfort her! Finally a search on the internet turned up a new (old) idea: re-using eggshells! My husband then remembered his grandmother used to do this!
Almost every Sunday, we each have one or two eggs. And until then we had been putting the eggshells in the brown bin with the other compost. But I read that eggshells were a good way of adding a natural calcium fertilizer to the soil, and this was a good way to help prevent the moss from growing in the garden. All you need to do is dry the eggshells and grind them down to a fairly fine powder...
So this was our solution. We bought a small metal mortar and pestle and it became DD1's task to grind up the shells for use in the garden. Our solution was well-received by her teacher and classmates and in later years when she was in the throes of the "Harry Potter" craze she referred to this task as her "Potions" homework! And we have noticed a significant reduction of moss in our garden!
It's not a big thing, but it is one more small thing that allowed us to need less fertilizer for the grass and still have a nice lawn. And it made my daughter happy! But Kermit did know what he was talking about with the song "It's Not Easy Being Green..."!
I hope I have in some small way helped you to think about the environment and ways you too can "Reduce your footprint"! And I wish you all a great S.O.S. and Blog Action Day!
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Several years ago when DD1 was in the Dutch equivalent of first grade, her class got involved in a project to help "Save the Environment" and each child came home with a contract that they were to sign that committed them and their family to doing one extra thing for a whole month to reduce the amount of waste that their family contributes to the environment. While this sounds like a great principle, it created a major dilemma for us as we were already doing almost everything we could to reduce the amount of waste we generate. The contract came with a few simple examples that we had already been following for years:
- Paper recycling - including the brochures and free newspapers, old envelopes, receipts and financial papers that have been shredded, etc. We even took this a step further and re-used gift wrap at least once before putting it in the old-paper bin for recycling. And already for 2 years we had been supplying the school with "scrap paper" for drawing, etc. as my husband collected the cover-sheets from computer printouts at work which had only 3 lines on one side of the paper!
- Glass recycling - food jars, wine bottles, cosmetics containers, etc. Again, we had been doing that for years. And taken it even further by re-using glass jars for leftover sauces and condiments in the fridge. And I had the previous month supplied the school with 2 dozen small jars of similar size and shape for use in one of their art projects!
- Composting - putting coffee grounds, potato peels, banana skins, with leaves and grass cuttings to be decomposed and used on the garden. In our village, every other week the "brown bin" is collected where all the decomposable waste can be put in. And every summer there is an announcement telling the families when they can pick up their 2 free bags of fully decomposed compost mulch for use in their gardens. We have always been very conscious about what we put in the compost bin and this container is usually fuller than the regular trash bin collected on the alternate weeks.
- Clothes and textile recycling - at various locations there are containers that accept clothes, shoes, linens, etc that are re-used, recycled or turned into rags. First of all, our family is a big proponent of hand-me-downs. My kids grew up loving to get clothes their cousin or older friends had worn. And when they were small, I shopped the second-hand stores for many of their jeans, jackets and playtime wear. And I have never thrown any item of clothing away if it could potentially be re-used by someone. Even old sheets and dishtowels become rags and floor clothes. And I have a pile of jeans and T-shirts that are used for patching knees and will eventually become a quilt (following my grandmother's tradition). The final stop for any clothes that cannot really be re-used is the recycle container where they can be turned into rags or filler.
- Books - Holland has a number of second-hand stores that accept books. Books that are damaged can also be put in the old paper recycling containers. You should realize I have trouble parting with any of my books and my children have inherited this pack-rat tendency. And I am very familiar with the local second-hand bookstores as I shop there regularly and have on occasion also sold them books. In other words, we do not throw away books. We even pass magazines on to friends and others we share with the school for use in their crafts.
- Toys - Many playthings are that are still in good condition can be donated to charity organizations for re-sale. Again, been there, done that. In fact, I am greeted by name at the local toy re-sale shop. The love getting the US toys and English language books as it offers something different they can sell in their shop!
And we have always been very careful about chemical waste. Used batteries are stored for when the "Chemical Car" comes to collect about once every two months. This vehicle, operated by the village, also collects any old household rest products such as paint, cleaning fluid, insecticides, aerosol spay cans, old medicines, and small electrical appliances and disposes of them responsibly. We have always used re-chargeable batteries or used an adapter instead of disposable batteries. And vinegar is one of my favorite cleaning products for cleaning glass and removing grease! Where possible we use CFC light bulbs and we turn off lights and electrical appliances when not in use. We use cloth hand towels instead of paper and coffee mugs instead of disposable cups (even at work!).
We have even adapted our gift-giving as often times there is really nothing we need or want and it is difficult to find something to send overseas friends and family. So instead we have a number of websites (listed here) where we can give to a charity in someone's name and they will receive a card describing their gift and how it helps. DD1 loved "adopting" a dolphin one year. One of my favorite gifts from my last birthday was a goat!
In other words, we have always been a very ecologically conscious family and have adapted our lifestyle as far as possible to try and live what we believe in. So when this project came along, it created a major drama (appropriate for S.O.S.) in our family to try and come up with something more we could do to meet the requirements of the contract our daughter wanted to sign and set a good example for her. She was in floods of tears at the thought of being the only one who could not put down something on the contract and my explanation that we were probably the most ecologically-minded family at the entire school did nothing to comfort her! Finally a search on the internet turned up a new (old) idea: re-using eggshells! My husband then remembered his grandmother used to do this!
Almost every Sunday, we each have one or two eggs. And until then we had been putting the eggshells in the brown bin with the other compost. But I read that eggshells were a good way of adding a natural calcium fertilizer to the soil, and this was a good way to help prevent the moss from growing in the garden. All you need to do is dry the eggshells and grind them down to a fairly fine powder...
So this was our solution. We bought a small metal mortar and pestle and it became DD1's task to grind up the shells for use in the garden. Our solution was well-received by her teacher and classmates and in later years when she was in the throes of the "Harry Potter" craze she referred to this task as her "Potions" homework! And we have noticed a significant reduction of moss in our garden!
It's not a big thing, but it is one more small thing that allowed us to need less fertilizer for the grass and still have a nice lawn. And it made my daughter happy! But Kermit did know what he was talking about with the song "It's Not Easy Being Green..."!
I hope I have in some small way helped you to think about the environment and ways you too can "Reduce your footprint"! And I wish you all a great S.O.S. and Blog Action Day!
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